Dad Jokes

"I got cut off by a taxi driver last week.
I was walking through town today and I saw him at the back of the queue at the taxi rank.
I got in the first taxi in the queue and said "How much to the station ?"
"$5" said the driver. "And how much for a blow job ?" I asked him.
"That's disgusting" he said "Get out of my cab"
I got in the second taxi and said "How much to the station ?".
"$5" said the driver. "And how much for a blow job ?" I asked him.
"I'm not having any of that" he said "Get out of my cab"
I worked my way down the line, getting thrown out of each taxi in turn, until I came to my target at the back of the queue.
"How much to the station ?". "$5" said the driver.
"Ok" I said "Let's go"
As we pulled out and overtook the other taxis I wound the window down and gave all the other drivers a thumbs up with a big grin on my face!!."
 
Freds55 said:
Did you hear about the new food delivery service that features people wearing really tight jeans that were popular in the 80's?

It's called Jor-Dash 🤣
Click to expand...
And I wrote a song about 'em. Ready? Think back to the early 60's hot rod car mechanic and his main squeeze.

VALVOLINE GIRL

I don't drive no fancy car, or hot-rod type machine
I just like the way you look in your Jordache cut-off jeans

Yeah, you get the finest money can buy but you never overspend
I just like your cut-off jeans like my Datsun's wide back-end

So give me everything you've got, but please don't treat me mean
Just need a hot-rod girl who cleans up nice after soakin' in Valvoline

SOLO BREAK

I don't want no trouble from the police 'n lawyers 'n such,
I just know to back off when you don't want no gentle touch

So please don't say, "See you later back in court next week,"
"Cause you know I can't get enough of you're cut-off Jordache jeans.

So give me everything you've got, but please don't treat me mean
Just need a hot-rod girl who cleans up nice after soakin' in Valavoline.

SOLO

BRIDGE

I can give you most things you want, just tell me I ain't wastin' my time,
Valvoline girl, just say that you'll love me, and we'll be partners in grease 'n grime.

So give me eveything you've got, but please don't treat me mean,
Just need a simple hot-rod girl I can treat just as good as my filter-lubed machine.
 
bleujazz3 said:
And I wrote a song about 'em. Ready? Think back to the early 60's hot rod car mechanic and his main squeeze.

VALVOLINE GIRL

I don't drive no fancy car, or hot-rod type machine
I just like the way you look in your Jordache cut-off jeans

Yeah, you get the finest money can buy but you never overspend
I just like your cut-off jeans like my Datsun's wide back-end

So give me everything you've got, but please don't treat me mean
Just need a hot-rod girl who cleans up nice after soakin' in Valvoline

SOLO BREAK

I don't want no trouble from the police 'n lawyers 'n such,
I just know to back off when you don't want no gentle touch

So please don't say, "See you later back in court next week,"
"Cause you know I can't get enough of you're cut-off Jordache jeans.

So give me everything you've got, but please don't treat me mean
Just need a hot-rod girl who cleans up nice after soakin' in Valavoline.

SOLO

BRIDGE

I can give you most things you want, just tell me I ain't wastin' my time,
Valvoline girl, just say that you'll love me, and we'll be partners in grease 'n grime.

So give me eveything you've got, but please don't treat me mean,
Just need a simple hot-rod girl I can treat just as good as my filter-lubed machine.
Click to expand...
I like how you specify the "solo break". :p
 
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