Why Are Doctors So Stolid?

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I'm cracking some of my best jokes and I can't even get a chuckle.

Dr. Wu: Your ears need cleaning,
Me: I know. I had your PA clean them last year and afterwards I could hear a mouse fart.
Dr. Wu: Hmmmm, interesting.

Dr. Johnson (my urologist): Good morning Mr. Chase.
Me: Good morning Dr. J. Do you know why I call you Dr. J?
Dr. Johnson: J for Johnson obviously.
Me: Nope. J for Jellyfinger.
Dr. Johnson: Hmmmm, interesting.
 
I've had the same problem, and I wonder if it's really the profession itself sucking the life out of people, or people with no personality being attracted to the profession.

My wife and I met a girl who said she was a doula, who helps women with childbirth. She said there are also "death doulas," who help people die well. I asked, "You mean, like ninjas?" She didn't think it was funny, but a lady nearby doubled over laughing in spite of herself.
 
There is a local doctor named Dr. Tarr. He’s probably in his mid sixties, now. I asked him if he ever heard of the Alan Parsons Project, because of the song, ”The System of Dr. Tarr and Professor Feather”. He said he hadn’t (Must have had his head buried in his books at medical school at the time, I think.)
my wife is a nurse and was working at that clinic, and I told her what I said. She told the, so THAT’s why he was listening to some music on his computer later that day.
I saw him a few months later and asked him about it, and he liked the song, based on an Edgar Allen Poe story of the inmates running the asylum, and he had played it for his wife. He said she was unimpressed!
 
Hehehe. I turned my dentist on to Porcupine Tree long ago. He’s actually a fellow guitar player and funny as hell.

I think docs are careful about using humor until they realize that you‘re cool with it.
 
How about the classic of telling the doctor “It hurts when I do this” but never getting the proper response.
 
I'm cracking some of my best jokes and I can't even get a chuckle.



Dr. Wu: Your ears need cleaning,

Me: I know. I had your PA clean them last year and afterwards I could hear a mouse fart.

Dr. Wu: Hmmmm, interesting.



Dr. Johnson (my urologist): Good morning Mr. Chase.

Me: Good morning Dr. J. Do you know why I call you Dr. J?

Dr. Johnson: J for Johnson obviously.

Me: Nope. J for Jellyfinger.

Dr. Johnson: Hmmmm, interesting.
TBH, both of those jokes likely fall into the category of "I've been hearing that one since I was a young intern." Kind of like if your doctor quoted Murphy's Law to you, and wondered why you didn't find it hilarious. Imagine how many rectal-penetration jokes Dr. J hears in a day.

The quickest way to fall flat is to crack a joke about someone else's name or profession. Ask me how I know. ;)
 
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Doctors want to have personalities but in a world where everyone is litigation-happy there's just no incentive to set yourself up to be sued by Karens who heard you tell a joke at the nurses station a half mile down the hall while Nana was in the ICU.
 
Telling a doctor a joke is like unwittingly giving your Dad a hard time. The humor softens the blow, but humor that is double-edged sometimes destroys the mood. Doctors would respond by simply telling you to have a cookie and glass of milk. (I make cookies and had a cuppa tea [with milk] this evening, and look! I'm alive to tell about it.)
 
Years ago, when I was in my thirties and sick and tired of how my teeth meshed, I went to a friend who was an orthodontist and had him do some rather drastic work, but, during each session I’d quote Bill Murray from Little Shop of Horrors and tell him “It’s your professionalism I respect.”

He eventually asked why I said that, so I explained, and the next appointment he started laughing, said he’d watched the movie and loved the reference.

It was still terrifying as he’d approach me with various implements in hand, but at least he was laughing.

And, if you haven’t seen the movie then watch it because it is funny and it will all become clear.
 
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There’s nothing about being a doctor that’s funny, IMO…
These people dedicated their lives to making yours better.
Though, my cardiologist is not totally a black face.
 
There’s nothing about being a doctor that’s funny, IMO…
These people dedicated their lives to making yours better.
Though, my cardiologist is not totally a black face.
Regards doctors; they are trained to hear things, just like musicians are, in order to diagnose an illness or condition. It may very well be what we say when we speak to our doctors that can help the doctor provide better treatment, instead of trying to humor him that only makes his job more difficult.

My Dad's cardiologist, Dr. Twaddle (yup, his name), many years ago, when Dad was in for open-heart surgery, had a sense of humor that was dry as a tumbleweed. The reason the humor was so dry was because the doctor's patients could not be made to laugh, for fear of rupturing delicate sutures from surgery.

Dad once told me, the doc visited his hospital room after surgery and these were his words, as Dad held his blanket tightly..."Mr. G, you know, if you look out this window, you can just about see above the building next door."

Dad didn't want to laugh because it might have caused pain. Dad put on his best, "Uh-huh" face, and as the doc walked out the door, Dad pulled the blanket up over his mouth and bit on the blanket so as not to laugh.

The doc had likely seen numerous patients in his practice that had just gone through surgery that needed a little humor to brighten their mood, but could not be made to laugh with anything more than very, very dry humor.
 
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Years ago, when I was in my thirties and sick and tired of how my teeth meshed, I went to a friend who was an orthodontist and had him do some rather drastic work, but, during each session I’d quote Bill Murray from Little Shop of Horrors and tell him “It’s your professionalism I respect.”

He eventually asked why I said that, so I explained, and the next appointment he started laughing, said he’d watched the movie and loved the reference.

It was still terrifying as he’d approach me with various implements in hand, but at least he was laughing.

And, if you haven’t seen the movie then watch it because it is funny and it will all become clear.
I recall reading from a group of students' writings years ago that was a collection of the best metaphors and similes.

Yours and these words gave me pause:

"They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Margaret Thatcher's teeth."

Also based from:

"He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it. "
 
I'm cracking some of my best jokes and I can't even get a chuckle.

Dr. Wu: Your ears need cleaning,
Me: I know. I had your PA clean them last year and afterwards I could hear a mouse fart.
Dr. Wu: Hmmmm, interesting.

Dr. Johnson (my urologist): Good morning Mr. Chase.
Me: Good morning Dr. J. Do you know why I call you Dr. J?
Dr. Johnson: J for Johnson obviously.
Me: Nope. J for Jellyfinger.
Dr. Johnson: Hmmmm, interesting.
Pretty easy to see when someone is passionate about what they do or are just going through the motions for some other goal. Maybe he's more excited when he gets the payment for services rendered.
 
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