There are a lot of different ways to skin a cat. The reality of our situation is that we run our own sound and we don't have state of the art equipment or rooms. We have certainly learned over the years to EQ our setup to avoid the feedback, but in doing so we sacrifice somethings else (someone being heard in the mix to their liking, etc). I have also learned I can only turn my monitor up so much before the feedback becomes an issue and because we are playing and doing sound at the same time, we can only make minor tweaks during shows - if any.
Whether we spend money on a new board, new FOH speakers, new IEMs, or new floor monitors, we are going to spend it somewhere - we're just trying to find the solution that gives everyone the best options and experience. Based on feedback here and knowing our situation, this is the solution that works best for us right now I believe. Sure, in a perfect world we would be expert live mixers with the equipment that allowed us all the flexibility to craft a beautiful stereo mix for everyone, but that's not the case. I appreciate all the feedback - over time I'm sure I will learn to use the IEMs better for our situation or get better IEMs, but as of right now, I have found that even when I am playing by myself and I have the whole mix for my guitar alone - I am not getting the same feeling I get with pumping volume through a speaker that I can hear and feel and that is affecting my performance and how I feel when we play live. We aren't professional musicians - we are a bunch of dudes with other jobs and families - so we don't have unlimited time to tweak, practice and learn, so when we do get the chance to play out, we all need to be in a good place so that we play as well as we can. The FRFR solves my issue without affecting my bandmates who are already happy with their sound on stage and FOH. Cheers and thanks again for all the help here.