Who Else Struggles With Their Nerves?

fcs101 said:
Joe Bonamassa had an interview with Tina Guo where they discuss basically developing a performance personality which they shift into when the time comes. I think that also goes hand-in-hand with his stage attire (suit and dark glasses).
Click to expand...
This is true. Many performers exude a stage personality in front of applause and cheers. One might wonder if the same personality feels sad once they're stepped away from the limelight? Perhaps this was one reason many don't actively seek fame, because of the letdown one might feel once the show ends and you head back to the quiet of your room...

Yet that is a separate issue from anxiety. Perhaps overcoming anxiety can be thought of as a way of coping with the audiences' attention, yet needing to put on a false front each time has its detriments...
 
I try to change my perspective about being nervous. I instead try to understand it as excitement. Sometimes it helps. Sometimes not so much.
 
Regards the negative emotions, it might be helpful to view sadness or excitement as an avenue for channeling your emotions.

My feeling is that sitting in a bar drinking and listening to music may have a saddening effect, simply because the music or atmosphere may not exude positive feelings. Don't buy into the so-called reported "positivity rate" of Covid as someone's way of further discouraging you.

If someone might feel depressed, try channeling "the blues" instead. There are numerous ways you can approach this: from a rock-blues or jazz-blues view, for example. Singing about your angst also has a therapeutic effect of calming and comforting you. If singing isn't your thing, rely upon your instrumentals as your manner with which you channel your emotions.

Regards excitement, most anyone can engage an audience with an uptempo song that involves audience participation. This will actually stir an audience so that they also feel what you're singing/playing. If it's possible for you to do this, you're connecting with the audience on a higher level than you did previously. Not only will this help you gain a fanbase, but also will help you gain respect among your fellow musicians.

FTR, I'm not a well-seasoned nor widely-experienced guitarist. This has all been taught to me over the many years from 2002 until the present when I first started joining in at open-mics locally. My knowledge is based on observation, listening to more experienced musicians, asking questions, and being able to read an audience for cues which might direct my choice of songs.

This all serves to strengthen what otherwise might be a "weakness" that can be interpreted as a fear of being onstage. If you can speak the audiences' language in music, you've solved half your problem. If you can't, you'll never be understood as a musician. And, you'll likely suffer the consequences as a result.
 
don_joe said:
Having friends and people around during the rehearsals helps too. You get used to people listening, even when you make mistakes while playing. You learn that nothing bad happens and you start enjoying their attention and the music instead of being afraid.
Click to expand...
For some reason, I've most always needed space when I practice. It's not so much about making mistakes as it is about making sure you can transition through any "difficulties" easily. Mistakes often happen when you're in a hurry or stressed by something. Maintaining a sense of calm helps prevent mistakes.

Even if some clams might occur, just as long as they aren't carried throughout the song or over your setlist, no one is going to remember how many mistakes you made. "Bad" is a relative term. Making bad decisions can cause tragedies. "Poor note choice" is not going to cause you any harm. You might feel embarrassed or badly because you didn't play well.

Every individual strives to do his best unless he doesn't care about what he offers to others. If you don't care, you'll never improve. If you do care, you'll do what you can despite how limited your abilities may be. (Present company included. 😉 )
 
I think "bombing" in front of an audience multiple times is the best thing that can happen.. Usually you hear that word used for comedians, but it works for a lot of things.. The pressure we put on ourselves far exceeds that of what we think the audience expects so we psych ourselves out. While it may never go away completely, the butterflies, nerves, etc., it can get better.. I changed the way I practice to account for my nerves in that for me muscle memory is key... Playing a lick or chord prog/comp line literally 1000s of times even if I'm just sitting on the couch binging a series or getting brainwashed by the news has helped me a lot. The "Cult of Personality" signature lick/motif used to cripple me in a live situation even if I was just playing it "as a joke" or for fun in between songs/sets.. I finally just used that lick as a practice tool.. But yeah, muscle memory and knowing your fingers slip into that glove effortlessly when nerves start to amp up helps.. helped me anyways..
 
For me, being prepared is the best defense against stage fright, but you have to be careful not to overdo it. One of my worst performance experiences was at a classical guitar showcase. I made the mistake of practicing while waiting to go onstage. There was this one measure I kept screwing up, and it freaked me out. By the time I was supposed to play, I was a nervous wreck. I made a ton of errors, and even skipped a section entirely because I could only focus on how miserable I was. These days, I practice until I can play something without making a mistake, and then I stop or work on something else.

Filming yourself—or just recording in general—is a learned skill. Luckily it’s one that you can practice when there are no stakes involved. If you watch a lot of YouTube performances, it’s easy to get the impression that people are one-take virtuosos. For some, maybe that’s true, but for most, what you’re not seeing are the dozens, perhaps hundreds, of takes that were required to get a satisfactory performance.
 
While a lot of these suggestions are great, they still gloss over the very real phobia of performing in front of people. It's not something that simply goes away through preparation. It's like the fear of heights or claustrophobia; there's really nothing one can do to overcome or ignore some phobias.

A couple of cases in point:

I'm afraid of heights, have been my whole life. I rode a motorcycle for a few years and one day went to Coronado, CA which meant riding over the Coronado Bridge. I had been over that bridge many, many times over the years previous in cars visiting relatives but something about being on a motorcycle caused a major bout with my fear of heights. It wasn't on my mind in any way but when I approached the apex of the bridge, I looked to the side to admire the view, as I had done just about every time before- in car -, but this time was different. I was "vulnerable", wasn't in the perceived safety of a car. I was alone, in the open, on my motorcycle with seemingly nothing to keep me from going over the edge. I had to move to the center lane and hug the median in order to make it over.

Fast forward to just a few years ago; I was with our grandchild at a park and they wanted to ride the Ferris wheel. It was a small one so I thought it wouldn't be a big deal. Everything seemed to be okay until the ride ended and they were going to start letting people off. As we approached the top and stopped, the fear set in, I thought we were going to fall- I felt like an idiot! It had been years since I felt that fear and it made me realize that these fears are 'hardwired' into some people that in some cases can be debilitating.

People who don't experience this type of phobia, no matter how hard they try or how well intentioned they are, cannot understand or begin to offer advice on how to 'overcome' it. When it comes to stage fright, repetition is key. The more you perform, the more you can understand your body's response and learn how to play through it. I can't say I embrace it but I do expect it which is part of the battle; acknowledge the fear but don't let it control you or stop you. The more you play, the more comfortable you will become playing through the fear. It's not as simple or easy as practice more and ignore it.
 
JoKeR III said:
While a lot of these suggestions are great, they still gloss over the very real phobia of performing in front of people. It's not something that simply goes away through preparation. It's like the fear of heights or claustrophobia; there's really nothing one can do to overcome or ignore some phobias.
Click to expand...
This reminds me of how, when I was young, I used to walk the tops of walls when framing houses. No problem. Then one day the fear of falling set it. I started to try and talk myself into it, telling myself I've done this hundreds of times, but as I started to move, my legs began to shake, and I realized if I tried to push myself through this fear, I'd probably fall. So that day I stopped walking walls.

If I decide to perform again, I'll start with open mics, and I had already thought that I'd do what Bleujazz suggested, and just go check out the scene a few times first.

But if I ever gig again, I'm not approaching it from an improv setting, like jamming with unfamiliar musicians at an open mic. I would just do that as a stepping stone to getting back in front of an audience in a cover band. So I do agree that preparation and having that muscle memory take over for you are key to minimizing the nervousness, that I'm sure will always be there. I just need to get back into that comfort zone, that certainly includes some anxiety, but it's derived from excitement, not fear.
 
TSJMajesty said:
This reminds me of how, when I was young, I used to walk the tops of walls when framing houses. No problem. Then one day the fear of falling set it. I started to try and talk myself into it, telling myself I've done this hundreds of times, but as I started to move, my legs began to shake, and I realized if I tried to push myself through this fear, I'd probably fall. So that day I stopped walking walls.

If I decide to perform again, I'll start with open mics, and I had already thought that I'd do what Bleujazz suggested, and just go check out the scene a few times first.

But if I ever gig again, I'm not approaching it from an improv setting, like jamming with unfamiliar musicians at an open mic. I would just do that as a stepping stone to getting back in front of an audience in a cover band. So I do agree that preparation and having that muscle memory take over for you are key to minimizing the nervousness, that I'm sure will always be there. I just need to get back into that comfort zone, that certainly includes some anxiety, but it's derived from excitement, not fear.
Click to expand...
I'm not minimizing the need for dedicated practice and being prepared, that's a given for anyone who wants to perform on a stage. Not being confident in your parts due to lack of preparation can induce a form of anxiety whether you have a phobia or not.
 
TSJMajesty said:
If I decide to perform again, I'll start with open mics, and I had already thought that I'd do what bleujazz suggested, and just go check out the scene a few times first.

But if I ever gig again, I'm not approaching it from an improv setting, like jamming with unfamiliar musicians at an open mic. I would just do that as a stepping stone to getting back in front of an audience in a cover band. So I do agree that preparation and having that muscle memory take over for you are key to minimizing the nervousness, that I'm sure will always be there. I just need to get back into that comfort zone, that certainly includes some anxiety, but it's derived from excitement, not fear.
Click to expand...
TBH, the way I began at open-mics was ripping through an acoustic improv using a DADGAD capo. There was something liberating with utilizing an entirely new form of chordal concepts; diads, triads, double-stops, and the like. Very enjoyable! The audience was taken aback by a guy who previously had not been onstage before...you can imagine the smile I had on my face as I stepped back into the green room area...I had made my mark back then, but realized that most of open-mics were playing either familiar songs or unknown originals. It was entirely enjoyable being able to offer something the regular crowd had not heard before...

I think the point of all this discussion (relating to stage fright) is learning to step out of your comfort zone and experience a variety of possibilities without doing anything unlawful. As teens we all tried bending the rules to see how far we could get away with stuff before our parents took the T-Bird away. As adults, we know better, and need to make good decisions instead of bad ones, which could produce consequences. Too often we view the results of bad decision-making.

Nothing wrong with getting your hands dirty from doing an honest day's work; just remember you'll need to get cleaned up before you can enjoy a healthy meal with your family or friends...
 
JoKeR III said:
I'm not minimizing the need for dedicated practice and being prepared, that's a given for anyone who wants to perform on a stage. Not being confident in your parts due to lack of preparation can induce a form of anxiety whether you have a phobia or not.
Click to expand...
TBH, I have a phobia of getting sick. This stems from years of knowing how my body reacts if and when I come down with something...thankfully, I've avoided both colds, flu, and Covid the past 2 years by utilizing some preventive common sense measures familiar to most everyone.

A phobia, in itself, is an inordinate fear of something. Essentially, a limitation that prevents you from enjoying life as you know it.

In comparison, I have a few things about my physiology I'd term as "weaknesses" that can cause adverse health reactions (allergies) but I've learned to live with these and treat them accordingly. Many others have these as well. We just are used to them and realize that they may not fade with time, and so we medicate, or treat the symptoms. If there were a way we could prevent these, that would be a cure, not a treatment plan.

The issue is that sickness is always part of everyday life whether we are actually ill or not. And that the medical practice community has kept its doors open to those who are ailing. When by some miracle all sicknesses cease to exist, that will be a time when I can throw away the fetters of my former life, realizing that perfect health would indeed be a blessing.
 
All great suggestions here from everyone some very wise words.

If it helps, try remembering why your performing in the first place, be it in front of an audience or the camera
Your doing it because you’ve written or learned a piece of music that’s cool and you can’t wait to let them hear it!

Thinking this way makes you more excited in a positive way rather than worrying about your performance

Get yourself exposed and just record yourself multiple times nervous or not , the focus is to do it enough that you get desensitised to it and it becomes familiar

I hope this helps, fwiw I played in a band all over the uk multiple venues etc and was never’ nervous’ as I was only thinking about playing people some cool riffs/songs and never focused on nailing every performance, that said I am a naturally shy and introverted kind of guy .

So turn it around in your head
Start thinking ‘ I wanna show you this it’s awesome’
And record your videos a lot to become more familiar with it
Again hope any of helps
 
I think it's fairly normal if you're not gigging very often, or if you have large gaps in your live shows schedule. I used to get really nervous before gigs, but these days I don't. I sort of arrived at a comfortable space where I'm basically just playing for myself - I don't really care what the audience thinks. Listen to the music and buy some merch please.

That's one way out of it anyway.
 
Ditto to the on-stage persona. Steve Vai commented on that - he's a character on stage.

I also found that rehearsing the first few minutes helps. Write a script for your opening banter. Rehearse / time it. Make sure your first song (at least the first bits) are "indestructible" - you could play/sing it while dodging beer bottles :)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom