SYMPHX...
What you said is some of the reviews I've been reading.... and then I came across this guy...
Got Metal! E minor Progression played on Carvin spalted maple UltraV guitar. - YouTube
He seems like an OK player, and he's playing through a Carvin Legacy similar to Vai's...
And it's a Carvin guitar and nicely recorded.
But my god, that guitar tone kind of SUCKS.
It sounds like everything you just described, thin, mechanical, lifeless...
I don't know if that's a result of his pickups which I think are stock carvins or if it's just a poorly set amp or EQ.
But that tone is pretty god awful.
I've got old bootleg recordings of Randy Rhoads that were poorly recorded by fans in the audience that have extremely poor sound quality but yet the tone that does manage to come through sounds better than that guys garbage.
A lot of people say CC Deville sounded thin or bright, but he had the tone of a GOD on the Poison CDs compared to this mess.
His videos are some of the best recorded examples I have been able to find though that are Metal/Hard Rock styled, but that tone is what I am afraid of being stuck with if I get a Carvin....