Need to vent: Cancer Sucks RIP 8/16/62 - 12/25/23

Your mom's suffering is done, and, from the sound of it, your brother's may also in the near future. Doesn't make it much easier to think about that in the middle of the huge loss you're feeling, but I hope it helps a little. I can't imagine losing my mom. Losing my grandparents, each in their own time, was bad enough. My sincerest condolences to you and your family.
 
@Rich5150, My sincere condolences for your loss of your Mom, and again my best wishes to your brother along with my thoughts to yourself, your family, and your friends.

I know how tough times like this can be. My Mam (UK) was taken from us when I was 11 years old. She was just 45. This was a sad time for everybody involved. It was horrible. But one thing has never changed. I still love her, and there is not a day that goes by without her being in my thoughts. The thoughts are happy ones.

I hope that any sadness for your loss that you will be feeling now will clear over time and that you will be able to remember happy times with a smile or a bit of a chuckle to yourself.

I wish that I could have had a brother like you back then too. You always come across as a nice gentleman. Your strength and support that you share with your close ones is outstanding.
 
Dixiethedog said:
@Rich5150, My sincere condolences for your loss of your Mom, and again my best wishes to your brother along with my thoughts to yourself, your family, and your friends.

I know how tough times like this can be. My Mam (UK) was taken from us when I was 11 years old. She was just 45. This was a sad time for everybody involved. It was horrible. But one thing has never changed. I still love her, and there is not a day that goes by without her being in my thoughts. The thoughts are happy ones.

I hope that any sadness for your loss that you will be feeling now will clear over time and that you will be able to remember happy times with a smile or a bit of a chuckle to yourself.

I wish that I could have had a brother like you back then too. You always come across as a nice gentleman. Your strength and support that you share with your close ones is outstanding.
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Thank you for all the kind words, and that goes for everyone on here that has commented.

After I had talked with his nurse yesterday I spoke to my one sister and she echoed what others in my family have said, that im doing a great job taking care of him, and while I don't search for platitudes I am grateful. I on the other hand don't feel that way, all I know is im trying my best to take care of him as well as I can.
 
So over the past week maybe week and a half (times kind of slipped since this part started) his ability to move and get to the bathroom on his own greatly diminished to the point where I was going over multiple times a day to make sure he was kept clean. Last night and this morning his ability to use the walker led to me getting him the wheelchair to the bathroom and back.
I made a call to his Dr's nurse and she conferred with the Dr and we all felt at this time it was best to move him to the hospital, And I discussed it with him as well. he also agreed it was time.
I and my family at least know he's safe and in good hands, and it takes a lot of stress off of me, as when I got him up this morning there were a couple of times he almost went down even with me holding him.
 
Rich5150 said:
So over the past week maybe week and a half (times kind of slipped since this part started) his ability to move and get to the bathroom on his own greatly diminished to the point where I was going over multiple times a day to make sure he was kept clean. Last night and this morning his ability to use the walker led to me getting him the wheelchair to the bathroom and back.
I made a call to his Dr's nurse and she conferred with the Dr and we all felt at this time it was best to move him to the hospital, And I discussed it with him as well. he also agreed it was time.
I and my family at least know he's safe and in good hands, and it takes a lot of stress off of me, as when I got him up this morning there were a couple of times he almost went down even with me holding him.
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Lots to process here. I am sorry he's doing worse than before. Without some miracle, though, it is the expected progression. Doesn't make it easy to endure for you, him, or your fam. The moving him to the hospital is going to make some things easier, and some harder, but you shouldn't feel guilt for it. It makes sure he gets the assistance he needs. Strength and peace to you and yours in this difficult time.
 
It's hard to understand why this has to happen. Lost my father to cancer when I was 16. 49 years without my dad. Well, I have an amazing son that I adore, admire, and love forever. I guess sometimes we find a way to get back some of the love that was stolen. I feel deeply for you, truly. Wish there was something I could do. Wishing you all peace.
 
I can only repeat the kind thoughts of everybody on here @Rich5150. If I am ever in a bad way I just hope and pray that I will have somebody like yourself on my side.

As @Bruce Sokolovic above (best wishes and thoughts to you are yours Bruce) mentioned, I am also going through a rough time with a family member suffering from the awful Big C. My family member, Margaret, was diagnosed with the Big C a few months ago and told that she only had about 3 months to live. And she managed a few more than that. I saw her a week or two back and commented that she looked great. Since then she turned poorly with the cancer moving to her brain. She is in the hospital and I think that if she makes it to Christmas it will be a miracle. This for me is sad, but not in any way near as what a brother would feel for his bro.

I might be thousands of miles away but my thoughts are with you. Stay strong my friend.
 
Tomorrow I am helping the son of my friend who passed away from cancer with some car maintenance. He is the same age as my youngest, and the same age as my father was when he lost his father. Life is hard and precious. Prayer's for you and your brother my friend.
 
So last night I received the call that I sadly had been anticipating for awhile, my brother is finally at peace and with our parents. He passed Christmas night hours after me and my one sister had been down to see him.We told him before we left that we loved him, and that it was time to go be with our parents and not suffer anymore.
We are all filled with sadness of course but also we’re are relieved that he is no longer in pain and suffering, the last few days of seeing him struggling to stay were the toughest on all of us.

I thank all of you for the kind words over the time this thread was started and allowing me a platform to just pour my thoughts and emotions out.
 
Rich5150 said:
So last night I received the call that I sadly had been anticipating for awhile, my brother is finally at peace and with our parents. He passed Christmas night hours after me and my one sister had been down to see him.We told him before we left that we loved him, and that it was time to go be with our parents and not suffer anymore.
We are all filled with sadness of course but also we’re are relieved that he is no longer in pain and suffering, the last few days of seeing him struggling to stay were the toughest on all of us.

I thank all of you for the kind words over the time this thread was started and allowing me a platform to just pour my thoughts and emotions out.
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Sad, but good it's over, like you said. Thinking of you folks.
 
So sorry to hear about your brother's passing. It was good you got to see him shortly before he passed. He was able to go peacefully with thoughts of his family fresh in his mind. And he is truly in a better place now with no pain and suffering. He was lucky to have you as a brother. All the best to you and your family during this difficult time.
 
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