Well, I bought one. If you are a traditionalist, I ask you please not judge me, but I bought an Ultra Luxe. (I am mildly ashamed because of the price.
For those who are curious, I'll share my thoughts:
- I tried the American Professional II. Very clear, wonderful pickups, but the bridge is way too bright, and the treble knob isn't particularly responsive. Still not a huge fan of the three saddle setup, although I know that many love it (and apologies to you if you do). The ones they had in this store darn near took your head off, which is consistent with my experience with them. That's not the sound I am looking for.
- They had a used American Pro with a 50s blackguard. This thing was great. Very well balanced. Like an American Performer II without the bite. But the neck was a little chunky — a Deep C, but getting close to a U? The neck was good, but compared to some of the others, it was not my favourite. But the sound was lovely.
- The Performer. Less alive than the used American Pro, which turned me off right away.
- A used Elite, which just sort of sounded anemic. I think the pickups left me cold.
- The Player series remains... uninspiring. (Sorry!)
- The Ultra Luxe had this incredible neck, and the contour and carves of the body are great. The pickups aren't quite as chimey, but once I EQ'd the amps, I got this thing to sound amazing. A little bit of a treble boost and it does the twangy thing without an issue, but mostly, this just felt like a Telecaster with the edges rolled off just enough that all the pickup positions were very usable. The guitar has a personality, but was also just incredibly versatile in what I could get from it — more so than the others.
Between the comfort and the versatility (remember, studio work), I ended up with the Ultra Luxe.
Thanks all for all of your help and insight with this. I see what each of you like with Teles. Turns out I just wanted something... less like a traditional Tele.
(Edited to fix mistakes and add mention of the used Elite.)