This will be odd.

[electronpirate]

So, I write. A lot. Thought this might be interesting to our audience:


It’s a contest of wills. I am determined to prevail. You have stared at me with a dark eyeball. Taunting, teasing. Trying to convince me that you have infinite patience to wait out the storm I bring.

But I continue to try. I bring my effort about every 2 hours, and test your resolve. So far, you have proven resilient. I actually applaud you while I wait for our next tilt.

But I have a solution. A ‘fix all’ that will bring succor and success. My pride will not allow this. We need to meet on the battlefield, and I must be victorious.

Thank you, little dot of shit inside my toilet, for giving me purpose. We are defined by our enemies…and you have proven…worthy.

 

[jon]

I almost thought you were writing about a certain forum member at first

 

[Burgs]

OK. I think I understand. I find that a 9-cup moka pot of black Vittoria coffee in the morning does the trick. Thoomp. Of course, I may have misunderstood. Don't push.

 

[R.D.]

OK. I think I understand. I find that a 9-cup moka pot of black Vittoria coffee in the morning does the trick. Thoomp. Of course, I may have misunderstood. Don't push.

For me it's a Venti "dirty" Chai from Starbucks .... Does "the trick" every time !

But there's also the fact that we're "old" ....

 

[ScottyB]

A mathematician would have worked it out with a pencil...

 

[maxdown]

Fine bit of prose that suggests you possibly live alone and probably need to get out more .... or fight your battles in foreign fields where at least you can conscientiously persuade yourself you might have done your bit enough to make the next attack by comrades successful without risking PTSD yourself .... it takes an army to win a war

If I'm right in understanding the theme ..... defeating tsunami resistant invaders tactically involves aim, height and available pressure but my supierior in the household chain of command places pragmatism over nobility and demands incisive and immediate action with a weapon of mass destruction.

If I'm wrong in my interpretation then it's going to be embarrassing

 

[TSJMajesty]

For me it's a Venti "dirty" Chai from Starbucks .... Does "the trick" every time !

But there's also the fact that we're "old" ....

I just had my first few sips of my morning Vanilla latte, and BAM, drop the kids off at the pool! (sidenote- How many euphemisms can we come up with for 'taking a dump'?)

 

[solo-act]

or...put another way...

 

[TSJMajesty]

"What does that one chunk want?" (Or was that Richard Pryor?)

 

[dr bonkers]

I just had my first few sips of my morning Vanilla latte, and BAM, drop the kids off at the pool! (sidenote- How many euphemisms can we come up with for 'taking a dump'?)

I always enjoyed the euphemism, "I gotta call my lawyer." Mrs. B's dad introduced me to that one and I guffaw like a twelve year old every time he says it.