I just noticed this thread was brought back to life. Please allow me to plunge the proverbial stake into its unholy heart by finishing my Tale of Woe:
In the end, I did not get the guitar I paid for (it looked nothing like the preliminary photos), Suhr refused to take it back (they offered me a guitar pedal as compensation for my troubles - insulted, I turned it down), I sold the instrument for a *significant* loss, and then I put the entire matter behind me.
(Nothing more to see here. Please move along now...)