A man is driving down the street and notices a sign in a front yard, “For Sale Talking Dog $10”. Curious, he pulls in the driveway and knocks on the door.
“Can I help you?”, the homeowner asks as he opens the door.
“I’d like to see the talking dog you’re selling”, the man replies.
“Sure, just walk around to the backyard. He’s probably sleeping. Pat him on the head once and I guarantee he won’t shut up” said the homeowner.
The man walks to the backyard and sees an old Golden Retriever sleeping under a tree. He gently pats the dog on the head and jokingly says, “So you’re a talking dog, huh?”
The dog slowly opens his eyes and says, “Well yes, I am.”
Dumbfounded, the man says incredulously, “This is amazing! You can really talk! How come the whole world doesn’t know about you?!?!”
The dog replies, ”Well, when I first started to talk, the CIA found out about me and they gifted me to the Soviet premier. I spent 6 years at his feet, learning all of the Russian’s secrets and relaying them back to the CIA. I’m responsible for the collapse of the Soviet Union and probably the Berlin Wall too. I helped end the Cold War. After that, I was brought back to the US and I spent the next 5 years as a drug sniffing dog at the airports. I’m responsible for all of the largest drug busts in history as I could not only smell drugs but I could spy on the smugglers. But now I’m old and I can’t hear or see very well so he wants to sell me.”
The man turns to the homeowner and says, “Why in the world would you ever sell this amazing animal?”
The homeowner replies, “That dog is a damn liar. He didn’t do any of that stuff!”
