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How do you guys stop your wife talking?

EricP1954

Experienced
According to this article ->Women really do talk more than men (13,000 words a day more to be precise) | Daily Mail Online, women like to talk a great deal more than men. Women have 30% more Foxp2 in their DNA than men, which is like steroids for the language center. So basically, by the time a man comes home from work, he's about done talking, and when she comes home, she still has half a day of talking to go! My hat's off to the men who have successfully cultivated an understanding we need time to woodshed and experiment with getting good sound. And getting a good sound is a great motivator for playing!
 

Sidivan

Fractal Fanatic
A long time ago, a very wise man told me the secret to communication in a marriage is listening. When he comes home from work, he sits down and lets his wife talk about her day for about 30 minutes. The entire time he simply makes acknowledgement noises, "Yep. Uh huh." but the key is to not be reading the paper or anything. At some point she'll say, "Thanks for listening" or something similar and then he walks away. 30 minutes of listening every day is a tiny amount to pay for happiness.
 

clarky

Axe-Master
A long time ago, a very wise man told me the secret to communication in a marriage is listening. When he comes home from work, he sits down and lets his wife talk about her day for about 30 minutes. The entire time he simply makes acknowledgement noises, "Yep. Uh huh." but the key is to not be reading the paper or anything. At some point she'll say, "Thanks for listening" or something similar and then he walks away. 30 minutes of listening every day is a tiny amount to pay for happiness.

and whilst she speaks..
she likes it even more cos he's smiling with joy and glee as he appears to be listening..
inside his head is the monkey on the bike..
 

NiceChris

Experienced
Ok Fellas - This is for real!

Every time I pick up an instrument, my missus starts talking at me... expecting me to listen, and provide considered responses.... And play.

How the hell can I play while I'm nodding my head and saying 'uhhuh...yep..uhuh'....

I bought her a bottle of Cointreau but that just made it worse!

Pauly

Watch out for that Cointreau, mate.

 

zenaxe

Fractal Fanatic
A long time ago, a very wise man told me the secret to communication in a marriage is listening. When he comes home from work, he sits down and lets his wife talk about her day for about 30 minutes. The entire time he simply makes acknowledgement noises, "Yep. Uh huh." but the key is to not be reading the paper or anything. At some point she'll say, "Thanks for listening" or something similar and then he walks away. 30 minutes of listening every day is a tiny amount to pay for happiness.

That only works for a woman who has the self control to stop after 30 minutes. My wife certainly doesn't and neither did any of the LTRs I had prior. "Listening" only encourages them. :D
 

Loquenau

Power User
When I was in that situation, the first thing I wanted to do when I got off was fuckin bone her. And she was the same.
 

Warrior

Power User
Let her know ahead of time your going to "practice" your guitar, then put on headphones, go into a different room or both.
 

RossE

Inspired
Early on my wife was my muse. Now it's old hat for her, so she's not nearly as interested anymore.

When your wife strolls in to yack at you, try asking her to listen to one of your riffs or rhythm parts. Play it two or three ways. Ask her which one she like best. Then say are you sure, and play if for her again. Then ask her how your tone sounds. Play it again with different patches. Ask which she likes best. Are you sure...play'em again.....etc, etc, etc.....

Repeat as directed the next few times she comes in wanting some titillating conversation. The results will go one of two ways:

1) You may find your wife is a killer muse and now you have a new bonding activity, or much more likely
2) She will avoid you like the plague when your jamming in fear you might engage her in another critique session.

I've done this enough mine seems to avoid even passing through the room when I'm playing.
 

ztevie

Experienced
Here it's more of the multiple personality syndrome:
Day 1: I go to play guitar, she comes in and says "That sounds really good, you should develop and record it so you don't forget it."
Day 2: I go to "develop and record" the stuff i worked on before. Ske comes in and says "You spend so much time playing guitar, that's all you think of! You promised to fix "this" or "that" last week, but you just play that stupid guitar..."
 

shredi knight

Power User
How do you guys stop your wife talking?



A better question is, why is your wife apparently allowed to speak unless spoken to in the first place? You should have trained her early on so she knows her place and this could have all been avoided.

I guess you didn't get the memo. :devilish:














(Yeah, I'm completely full of sh-t. What I hate the most is I'll be shredding scales and my wife will say the dreaded, "Play me a song" :lol).
 

Rook

Power User
(Yeah, I'm completely full of sh-t. What I hate the most is I'll be shredding scales and my wife will say the dreaded, "Play me a song" :lol).
"But honey, it isn't about making music. It is about playing this scale faster than the other guy..."
 

GotMetalBoy

Power User
I have a solution! All you need to do is buy your wife an Android Tablet and install Candy Crush and you will never be bothered again but she may end up becoming so addicted to Candy Crush that she no longer does laundry, vacuums or cleans. Oh and I recommend buying a SquareTrade.com extended warranty with accidental damage coverage for the Android Tablet because if you think things are bad now, you don't ever want to experience Candy Crush withdrawal.
 

Suhrfer

Experienced
I used to love her, but I had to kill her. I had to put her, six feet under. She's buried right in my backyard. :devilish:
 
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